There are days when introspection takes me to the depth of my soul. I see everything there and cannot help but sigh. The resolve I want can melt in a moment. I am naturally drawn to that which goes against my very nature of "natural" . I still am not able to eat meat....I simply wretch at the smell, and the other night a taste of meat in tomato sauce had me dry heaving for hours; I didn't want to dry heave..really!
I am tired of this. Tired of being so disciplined with intake, output, energy spent, that at times I lust at those that have no idea of what they are doing. They gorge on bacon double cheeseburgers washed down with coke and fries. They don't care about fatty acids or glucose levels. They are blissfully unaware..
So....as a confession, the unnatural craving for me was the indulgence of potato chips from a can....the ones closest to plastic in the molecular field (thanks Meadow Spurr) The ones that have no hint of natural anything...no hint of health...(I think I saw her eating these too, though,....Hey!!!) Perhaps, my malaise is with the fact she was wanting them for herself...and not because of my own demise at all. I am going with that right now...WTH!